The prices at the Whiggy Tease Presidents Day sale are so low, you’ll think we lost our lease. Actually, the prices are so low, you’ll think we are suffering from low self-esteem. You may fear we actually hate ourselves.
Rest assured, Whiggy Tease Nation, nothing could be further from the truth.
Trust us.
Look, we love our customers, and we love Presidents Day because we don’t have to go to our day job, so we want to pass some of this excitement on to you through an insane sale. Based on our market research, you have four favorite Presidents.
So you can go to the Whiggy Tease departments for Abraham Lincoln, James K. Polk, Ronald Reagan and Barack Obama and go crazy.
Every item in each of these stores has been drastically reduced.
But there’s a catch. This sale won’t last forever. In fact, our fellow Americans, this sale ends at our CEO’s bedtime on Monday.
And his bedtime is earlier than you might expect.
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